Meteor Garden: Episode 7 - Foreigner, traitor, superhero and more

Netflix Synopsis: A photo of Shancai surfaces online, making her the target of pubic humiliation. Ximen Yen and Feng Meizou track down the origin of the posting.

I will admit that this recap will be painful, because there's a lot of Thomas in this one and he pushes the level of awkwardness into new, unfortunate territories.

DMS and Shancai are in the school cafeteria, Shancai frantically looking out for Thomas and running right into DMS. He directs her to sit and eat and compliments her jacket. Let's break down the comment of "You're too skinny. I'm going to make you fatter." Let's brush aside the slightly patronizing, didactic tone and appreciate the fact that 1) He thinks you're skinny (which judgement aside, is generally better/more complimentary than "he thinks you're fat" in this era and not in a culture in which back fat is associated with wealth and prosperity) and 2) He will either feed you, or buy you food - viable means to make you fatter. Already you see signs that DMS has a heightened proclivity for understanding what women like: Shopping & Food. He's a smartie.

When Shancai offers to pay for the jacket #independentwoman, DMS responds with "I was never taught to ask the girls to pay." I've always been financially independent, I've never expected a man or anyone else to pay for anything that I may wear, experience or consume until there's a ring on that finger and then all that's communal...just say'n. SO - when a guy happens to pay for something, I don't expect it, and I may offer to pay for it, but I will not insist upon it. I will NOT make him feel bad for offering. I WILL graciously accept his generosity because sometimes it's just NICE for a guy to be nice. And in return, we should be NICE and say THANK YOU and not expect it again or anything in return. And Guys - we hope you were not hoping for anything more than a THANK YOU...because that would make you not as nice.

Oh - and we should all find someone who looks at us the same way that Shancai voraciously looks at that piece of meat - and for clarification - I mean the pork chop.

So when Thomas calls and she so awkwardly tries to conceal the conversation - DMS quickly goes into territorial mode when he insists on knowing if it's a guy or a girl who is calling and warns her that she's "dead meat if she does anything with another guy." Besides wondering if I've heard that "dead meat" expression since 7th grade, I'll admit that it's a touch stifling when a guy stakes his claim, way before you've had "The Talk" <include air quotes on this one>. There's a level of possession that can be endearing and useful at times, like avoiding creepsters hitting on you at the bar, or your man pulling you closer in so you don't get peed on by a drunk vagrant in the city, but all in all, I agree that DMS overstepped his bounds here again, but at least he's clear that he's totally into her and says what's on his mind, and that's worth at least a small meteoroid in this meteor garden. I think I'm still inspired by DMS's celestial jacket.

Of all the bad decisions that Shancai has made recently, I have to applaud a good one here when she rushes off with the pork chop in hand. No need to put good food down, even if you're in a hurry.

Ugh, Thomas. They could've done a better job casting this role, but it is what it is. The ponytail, the bad clothes, the bad accent. It's all so bad...

Anyways, he reveals that he took her back to a hotel because he didn't know where she lived. I'm sure that is true, but I'm also sure that ulterior motives were at play as well, especially since he mentioned that she put her head on his shoulder at the bar and told him that she liked him. So I was glad when he revealed that she had puked everywhere and that he had to clean it up. That's what you get, mister... Let's also note that Frenemies see her run off with him and don't have anything good to say about it.

He asks her to go out with him, when who shows up, but DMS (and his bad ass music!). He's not happy seeing her talking to another guy, so she tries to diffuse the situation by pretending Thomas is indeed a foreigner asking for directions. Oh Shancai... This is also when you get a feel for DMS's so-called multi-lingual skills which sadly, are not so great, but you're still a little impressed. In English, he asks "Where you from?" and when he learns Paris, he switches to Francais, and basically stakes his claim on Shancai. "She's my woman, don't touch her". While the jealousy is somewhat endearing, he takes it a bit too far, treating her like his property and not a girl that he's crushing on... Regardless, Thomas gets the message and scoots off.

Here's where Shancai deserves a forehead flick. She accuses him of overreaching because they aren't going out and you can see the dejection on his face. He walks away and she wonders why. Ugh, girl what ARE you thinking?!?! I can't take it.

Meanwhile a picture of a passed out Shancai and peace sign-throwing Thomas spreads across school like a forest fire. Why is everyone all up in their business? Slut shaming is never okay, but this is what she has to endure. Girls who should not be judging, are judging her. It's pretty awful, as bad as her baller skills on the basketball court. No one wants to sit next to her in class - it's not like she has head lice in 2nd grade, people...God bless Qinghe, who even after seeing the picture, claims that it's fake news.

Shancai tries to get a hold of Thomas, to no avail, trying to figure out why he'd betray her like this.

Wait, it's a SHIRTLESS F3! Put your stunner shades on because WOW, they are vampirey pale, skinny, and hairless.

I should put down my donut, but I'm not. Maybe if Nathan Adrian (half-Asian so we can watch) stepped out of the pool, I might.

But I'm not. Maybe I should swim more.

While comparing how many girls are clamoring after them, Ximen and Meizuo discover the hotel selfie. Good friends that they are, they prevent DMS from seeing it by pushing him back into the pool along with his phone.

As F2 put their Sherlock hats on, DMS in his shiny silver and black Liberace leather jacket ends up seeing the photo and is not happy. He confronts Shancai who tells him that nothing happened with Thomas, but calls her out on for lying to him. This is when you realize that she cares more than she leads on, when she tells him that she doesn't care if no one believes her, as long as she still has his trust. He scoffs and walks away. Ugh, heart breaking...

Especially when you see DMS drinking his sorrows away while F2 watches him from afar, making sure he doesn't do anything drastic. Does anyone else want some Ballentine scotch whisky, or is it just me? I'm telling you, the product placement in this show is genius... Ximen and Meizuo give themselves props by saying that they'd never let a girl put them in that position. And while continuing to self-congratulate, end up losing track of DMS, who wanders off.

Once again, he's caught in the rain without an umbrella - but still manages to look good in his Damask leather jacket and cropped pants, without a pineapple strand of hair out of place. He ends up in the same spot where Shancai found him in the rain - is he hoping that she shows up again? Aww, my icy heart is melting a little... Someone does show up with an umbrella! Li Zhen, WTF are you doing here?!?! In his drunken stupor, he kisses her, mistaking her for Shancai. My icy heart melts even further when his vulnerable side comes out, asking her why she'd lie to him. Oh, Daoming Si.

He wakes up the next morning in Li Zhen's bed! (How does the pineapple hair stay so perfect through rain and sleep?! Where is the product placement for that hair gel?) Traitorous Li Zhen basically throws herself at him and asks why he prefers Shancai, when they are practically the same kind of girl. She asks why he hates her, to which he replies, "I don't hate you. I don't care." Ouch... This is when she pulls out the big guns, saying that she can be like Shancai, who may look innocent and naive, but play guys left and right. She throws herself at him with a VERY passionate back embrace. Li Zhen, pick it off from the bottom of your shoe, or go buy some, but please get yourself some self respect!!! Luckily DMS is not swayed by her advances, turns her down, and adds some extra burn by saying that Shancai would never throw herself at a guy like that.

We learn that DMS likes to take his aggression out by playing a wicked game of racquetball and driving fast in his blue Beamer. Try as he might, he can't get Shancai out of his head and starts to realize that he may have been too hasty in his accusations.

Meanwhile, Shancai is leaving work when Tweedledum and Tweedledee (the hooligans who tried to attack her after DMS threw his food at her) accost her again! They drag her into an abandoned room where they slap her around and get bitten by her (YES!). Luckily, DMS in his AMAZING red coat, I mean superhero cape, I mean coat, is here to save the day!

You see Shancai about to be hit again, when someone grabs his arm (DMS!) and then proceeds to kick their asses left and right. In one of my favorite MG moments, he kneels down and apologizes for being late, takes her in his arms and tells her that if she says she didn't do anything with Thomas, he believes her. A hug ensues. Swoooooooon.

He carries her home in his arms and asks Mr. Dong to prepare a bath as he swooshes up the stairs in his red superhero coat. Bathrobe DMS is a totally diff person. It's like he switched from max hold hair gel to a softer, volumizing mousse, and I'm not sure what to make of it, like that gold, wilting flower on his bathrobe. Bathrobe version or not, we're still team DMS when he reprimands Shancai for complaining, instead of thanking him. Ice queen Shancai must be setting the tone in here, because you can see their breath from the chill in the air.

DMS seems relieved when he verifies that Shancai didn't mess with Thomas and admits that he's jealous. Not sure if there's a fly in the room, or if he's pretending to hit Thomas, but he aggressively hits something in the air before he dives into Shancai, leans over her on his bed, softens his voice and says it's because he likes her!! Meanwhile Shancai has her arms in front of her, preventing more bodily contact and looks to the left and right for what girl, FOR WHAT? For her to tell him WAIT? Does she need to go to the bathroom? Check her teeth, pop a mint? WHAT GIRL, WHAT?

One of the more controversial moments might be when he says "not even for 0.5 sec" and he goes in for a kiss. Now it's early in the series - but Shancai really does kiss like a dead fish, so it's hard to determine if she's into it or not. Let's remember that she was clearly into the pork chop at the cafeteria.

So, apparently she's not, because she runs off to go find the guest room to sleep. Poor DMS looks as sad as that flower on his robe, but I love the change in his tone when he tell her that he means it, and she should think about it.

CORRECTION: when she runs into the guest room, she wonders why she didn't stop him from kissing her - so kissing like a dead fish IS her M.O. She wonders what's wrong with her, and we too girl, are also wondering what's wrong with you.

DMS get a F4 joker card texted to him, so he changes into a non-superhero, but still fly outfit and brings Shancai out to meet up with F2. They tell her that the person who posted those incriminating pictures lives inside. Liz Zhen is just as shocked to see them, as Shancai is as shocked to see her. (Hmmm. I thought they were good friends? Has Shancai never been to her house before?) Li Zhen's face turns shades of alcohol red as F2 unravel the truth and she admits to her wrongdoings and why she's so furious. Poor Shancai is again confused, always confused this one, and questions why she would do such a thing, because aren't they good friends? Li Zhen - always feeling left out, also forgot her self-respect again in this conversation. Again - she has no one else but herself to blame for ruining that dress, even if she's just a supporting character. Hey - those are her words.

But the only interesting part about Li Zhen is when she tells Shancai that the reason why she did that to her is so that Shancai could feel what it's like to be hated. Wow, that's cold. Shancai - in pure chinese form - drops the tried-and-true phrase that just tears us up to pieces: "I am so disappointed in you." Shancai's communication skills are en fuego right now, as she tells her off and says that Li Zhen doesn't deserve to be her friend.

Oh - what's that Li Zhen? You borrowed a little bit of self-respect from Shancai when you tell her whatevs? That you don't need a friend like her either and that you no longer care? We love when Shancai pulls a DMS and abruptly leaves with the F3 posse in tow, and leave it to Meizuo to drop some wisdom on his way out. (Meizuo) Mic drop.


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