Meteor Garden: Episode 19 - HBD DMS

Netflix Synopsis: Shancai arrives at Ah Si's upper-crust birthday celebration, where an incident pits Ah Si against his mom, who's keen on humiliating Shancai.

Back at the tea shop, Shancai is a little freaked out about meeting DMS's mom and again reaffirming that she's not even his girlfriend. Even boba bestie can string together rational thoughts on why they should be together. Except why is she bringing up marriage? She's going from 1 to 1000 and they've only had 2-3 dead fish smooches...

Shancai is distracted because she doesn't know what gift to bring to his party, but boba bestie reminds Shancai of her culinary gifts and now she's inspired and stays late at the tea shop to make a special dessert to bring.

Shancai arrives at DMS's house in her finest white party dress, and F3 looking dapper in their bow ties give her the Queer Eye and take her back to touch her up.

Lei explains the significance of this party and the importance of it to the Daoming group.  More importantly Shancai finds out that she is the only girl DMS has ever brought home and that his mom will scrutinize her as his fiancee.

No pressure. She almost makes a break for it, but F3 drag her away for her makeover.

They're hoping that the right accessory can up-level her look, but that's pretty aspirational. They land on a simple gold key necklace, and even with the spritz of Chanel Chance, it won't be enough to compensate for her lack of social and economic status, which is still very important to Madam DM.

Let's get this party started! DMS, you are lookin mighty fine in that bright cerulean blue formal jacket, with that aggressive pineapple 'do.

He is so good looking that I didn't even notice that sparkly at-least-it's-better-than-a-bolo-brooch, and what makes him even more attractive is that he's kind of complimentary to Shancai - remarking that she looks elegant tonight, like she's from a hoity-toity family.

DMS is accepting lavish gifts from associates that do business with the Daoming empire. And how noble of DMS to sell these gifts off for charity.  Shancai is feeling very insecure about her gift and is looking rather sheepish, but OH SNAP, did DMS just snap his fingers to get his butler's attention? Can't decide if that's hot or not.  DMS breaks her out of her spell when he asks her about his gift. She claims that she forgot it, and DMS call her out on her poor form. I mean unless you have children and/or there's a specific request from the birthday host, there's no excuse for showing up to a birthday party without a gift. At the same time, as a host, you shouldn't ask guests where your gifts are either... Setting that aside, he still wants to introduce Shancai to his mom.

I love how DMS sees through her and calls her out on her crap. Although he does seem a little out of touch to not know why she'd be so nervous meeting his mom. Not everyone has your swaggy confidence, DMS. Dontchu know? Even though he says he's not introducing her as his girlfriend, she's still resistant, and hey now, it's never ok to grab a girl by her arm if she doesn't want to go with you.  That's a bit assaulty for my taste.

SO of course she falls and makes a scene and everyone is speechless.

She's on the floor and then all you hear is the echoing sound of the Daoming matriarch stomping into the room, wearing a LACE UP red velvet situation and striking intense fear with each step. Meanwhile I'm so confused by her outfit. From the back it looks like there's nude skin exposed behind the laces, but how is that possible with the frontal view of a full-on white turtleneck? #mindblown.
Maybe she is some dragon lady - Dragon Dao - with mythical powers... I mean she did give birth to a demi-god.

After what seems like 3 eternal seconds, DMS puts his drink down and comes over to to pick her off the floor. It's kind of amazing that Dragon Dao has such a blank, yet penetrating stare, and that she just stands there with her hands in her pocket. True piiimp, especially when she instructs DMS to  bounce his lady-friend the hell out of her house. Even the bow-ties on F3 recoil in fear.

Where's the Visine product placement to get the red out of DMS's eyes?  He does look like he's about to cry as he stands up to Dragon Dao and tells her "But sorry, I can't do that." And then he goes on about introducing someone who's very important to him and that he hopes that she can accept her. Shancai can barely contain her awkwardness as she struggles to make eye contact with anything else but the floor. I'm by no means an expert, but there's something a little off with Dragon Dao's Chinese accent. Maybe it's because she doesn't smile and her lips are curled in a pout-pout-fish frown.

F3 are trying to give her some cred, but Dragon Dao is only interested in her family's business domain. I thought Lei was pretty smart, but somehow he thought it was ok to proclaim that Shancai's dad is some BMOC in North Africa and UAE. How is that lie sustainable?  Lei, maybe take it easy on the hair perm fumes.  Dragon Dao tries to sniff out this lie by putting Shancai on the spot to play something on the piano for party.  Dragon Dao thinks she has Shancai trapped, but somehow Shancai sits at the piano and starts playing with the Dragon hovering over her, her claws still tucked away in her pockets.

The piano piece is beautiful in it of itself, and then Shancai decides that it's an appropriate soundtrack for her diatribe, when she preaches about what's really important. This crescendos to a moment when she says that " lost the right to have real human emotions".  Dragon Dao interrupts with a "Wha'choo talkin 'bout, Willis" and Shancai responds with a poetic line about what's really important, and starts laying down the truth, brick by brick.  She admits that she's not from a prominent family. but that her heart is open and honest. Dragon Dao does not lose her cool, but does promise that she will visit her family to meet President Papa Dong.

There's something symbolic about the earrings that Dragon Dao wears in this episode. Dangling balls that hang from her head. Hmmmmmm.

I'm sure anyone but DMS would have crapped in their pants by now, but he maintains his position that he really likes Shancai and that there's nothing Dragon Dao can do.  Even though she says that it's not up to him, you can't really stop true love, can you? Whatever Dragon Dao says doesn't really matter, even when she threatens him for unknown consequences. DMS makes a sweeping, dramatic gesture, grabs Shancai's hand with the right hand, and catches Ximen's keys with the left and leaves with a casual thanks.

Magically Ximen's bimmer is parked right out front and btw Shancai, where are your manners?  When a guy opens the door for you, you're supposed to reach over and open the door for him from the inside. She's in disbelief that this is happening, that DMS disobeyed his mom and is ditching his own party.  And am I the only squealing when DMS tells her to put on her seat belt in the cutest way ever?

He takes her to a rooftop with an incredible view of Shancai and Shanghai. (It's really making me look at flights to Shanghai again....). 
Shancai apologizes for messing up such an important party, and for causing conflict with his mom. He then has a moment when he says it's ok. because they're not close and work has always been more important to her than him. He maintains that he makes all the decisions in his life -- and we don't doubt him, because Dragon Dao is pretty scary.

Shancai wants to know why he is telling her this. Le sigh. DMS says "nonsense" and grabs her hand and then THE BEST PART!!!


NO, NO, NO, NO, NO Shancai. You DO NOT break eye contact, let go of his hand, walk away and change the subject, even if it's a story about your dad lifting you up on his shoulders so that you could reach stars. Just how many times did you fall off his shoulders and hit your head?? You've got serious issues. That's all I have to say about that.  

F3 have PTSD from the party and when Lei shared with them that he only showed Shanci how to play piano only once, and that he wasn't sure when she practiced...Wha'choo talkin' 'bout, Willlis. Like most Asians, I was subjected to decades of piano lessons, and you CANNOT pick up a piece like that unless you're some crazy prodigy. I'm calling BS on that one.  We all know that Shancai is crazy, but not necessarily a crazy piano prodigy.

Cut back to DMS and Shancai, and he's lifting her up in the air trying to catch a star. Cheesy. Yes, but I'll watch DMS in any scene.

His skinny arms couldn't lift her up for that long, but he does wrap them around her and asks her if she's given it some thought. OF COURSE Shancai doesn't know what IT is and he has to spell IT out for her. He wants to know her feelings for him, but she doesn't know. SHOCKING. She wants to ask him a question, and he mocks her a bit, but takes her question seriously.

She describes how mediocre she is and doesn't know why her? It could be slightly patronizing how he pets her, but I'm going to classify it as cute when he says that maybe he really is blind. He doesn't really answer after she kicks him, but instinctively whips out the box of cookies when she hears his stomach grumble. Realizing her mistake, she tries to hide them, but too late, he's got the box.

He opens the box and checks out each one. There's a cookie for every DMS!!! (I'm squealing with delight here!!!)

Notice the inconsistency with the cookies though? One box is all burnt, and the other is not...

She reaches out to grab them back, a little embarrassed, and he stops her.  He pulls her towards him and tells her that he wished she would have given him the gift earlier, because then he would have been so happy the entire night! He tells her that this is the best gift he's received in his entire life. Okay, now this is THE BEST moment in this episode!!! SQUEAL!!!

Finally, Shancai smiles and he slowly goes in for a kiss. I guess he goes slo-mo to give her a chance to run away, which there's always a 50/50 chance that she's this stupid.

Once again, super awkward (she's still carrying her purse), but at least she doesn't run away. I'll take that as a good sign.

Even Shancai does the walk of shame home at 6am.  See? It happens to everyone. I feel better about my dating days now. Her nosey parents want to know the deets - ewww, and she escapes to her room.

DMS bounces into Lei's bed, in which Lei is scantily clad in a long sleeve T. DMS cannot contain his giddiness and it's a sweet moment when Lei takes a cookie in his mouth and DMS can't even believe it. He hasn't even had one yet, and yet again, Lei has first dibs.

Dragon Dao is getting her treadmill action on and even with her mythical powers, she can't escape the asian flat ass destiny. (She may want to try some squats instead). Her minion is giving her the Dong family breakdown and Dragon Dao admits that Shancai is smart but believes that she's manipulative and is using the Daoming name to get ahead.

It's now 9am, Shancai is sleeping and there's a knock at the Dong family apartment. Dragon Dao and her minion are here to pay her to go away, 5 million yuan as a TOA.  Not bad, but then Dragon Dao uses a stumbling block metaphor that didn't go over so well. Mama Dong walks over and pours a bowl of flower over Dragon Dao's head and scolds her for insulting her daughter. Papa Dong plays along and pretends to throw water on her. Dong family = 1, Dragon Dao = 0.


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